I can't believe I am even doing this but I'm sort of desperate right now. I have a good job that I have had for almost 13 years and I make decent money but as a single-Mother things have always been tight. I am also going to school part-time and am very close to obtaining my degree. I have raised my daughter alone her entire life since her Father and I decided we shouldn't get married just because I was pregnant because our relationship was pretty much over at that point. I chose to go it alone and that's what I did. I lost touch with my daughter's Father for the first 6 years of her life but then I contacted him and he started seeing her sporadically and eventually started paying me a very small amount of child support. My daughter is a Senior in high school and is going to turn 18 next week. Her Father has already told me he is sending no more child support after her Birthday even though she will still be a full-time student. There is nothing I can do, we have no custody papers or court orders. The agreement was just between us (at his behest because he knew he couldn't afford what the courts would have ordered and I stupidly went along with it because I'm just too nice sometimes). Things were going OK at least I was making it until my daughter got her driver's license last August. When I added her to my car insurance my payments more than doubled. After a couple of months of paying this extra insurance I started to get behind on my bills. Over this past year I've been making payments on a trip for my daughter to go to California to march in the Tournament of Roses Parade. The total cost was $1650.00. In December it was down to the deadline and I still owed $400.00 so I had to pay it. This caused me to get behind on my rent and further behind on my car payment. Christmas, even though I didn't buy much at all, I had to buy my daughter things she needed for her trip. It was a very slim Christmas compared to previous years but I still spent too much and got even further in the hole with my two largest bills. The last two weeks of 2008 that generated my first paycheck in 2009 I was short on hours due to having to leave work and drive my daughter back and forth to school during her semester exams and so my paycheck was short. This only made things worse. I'm back on track working good hours now but I'm too far in the hole to get out without some help. I finally talked to my car payment people and they let me defer 2 payments to the end of my loan which helped some but last night when I came home from work there was an eviction notice on my door! I tossed and turned all night long and called in sick to work so that I could try to figure something out (I have sick/vacation time now that will pay me, but in 2008 I was out of benefit time which is why I had the short paycheck). My rent is $685.00 a month and I'm two months behind (about to be 3 on 2/1)! I sent them $380.00 last payday but I guess they didn't think that was enough to rescind the termination of my lease. I believe if I could give them 2 full months rent they would be agreeable to allow me to finish out my lease (in May) before moving. If not, I would use the money to move and work out a payment plan to pay my balance with my current landlord. My daughter has a job interview this afternoon and is pretty sure she will be hired to work part-time at a movie theater and her Father is going to buy her a car and pay her insurance for one year for her Birthday so I can take her off of my policy. I believe these two things will be enough to offset losing the $350.00 a month child support that I'm no longer going to receive. But the problem is I need money NOW to get caught up or we are going to be in trouble! I feel like such a failure as a Mother having all of these problems going on coming up on my daughter's 18th Birthday and causing problems during her Senior year. Lately, I feel so guilty I can't even look at her!
I'm not asking for any kind of long-term assistance just a one-time help back up to where I was before from someone who can afford it. I don't have good credit (which is why my car payment is so high, but I can't sell my car I've already tried that, but I still owe so much and I don't have enough equity to trade it in). I can't get bank loans and I have no friends or family who are in a position to loan me money. My Father passed away two years ago and even though he was very well off his wife retained his entire estate for some unknown reason. My Mother lives on Social Security.
If there is anyone who reads this who could find it in their heart to help me out I would be eternally grateful. I have a paypal account and you can also e-mail me at patriotgurl@gmail.com
Thank You.
ps: I'd like to add that some people may wonder why my daughter is just now looking for after-school work when she is 17 years old. My daughter, as previously mentioned, is a 4 year member of a very high-profile high school marching band. She had a job at Moe's Southwest Grill where she worked from April 08 until the end of August when school started. Going to school 5 days a week with band practice 4 afternoons a week and performing at football games on Friday nights and going to marching competitions on Saturdays....well I hope you get the idea that she had to quit that job because of her schedule, but it was always our agreement that when she got back from California she would find another job and she has been looking ever since January the 5th. Just wanted to add that information.
04-06-09 UPDATE:
Just an update on my situation. I worked out a payment plan with my landlord and decided to stay put and pay off what I owe and get back in good standing with them before thinking about moving. It's a very aggressive payment plan but so far I've paid them over $2000.00 over my last 4 paydays. A couple more months of paying extra and I should be caught up and back on track with that; however it it has been difficult and has caused us to sometimes not have enough food to eat and has put our utilities in jeopardy at times. Since my child support was cut off things have gotten worse. My daughter's Father DID buy her a car but asked me to put the car on my policy (under which my daughter was already covered) and then stiffed me for the insurance. Then less than 2 months after getting the car we learned that it needed brakes, so I had to pay to have those fixed. My daughter is working but only getting about 15 hours a week. I'm (luckily) being allowed to work some substantial overtime so I am and that's helping out some but I'm still having to take most of my daughter's money to help with bills and I would really prefer that she be putting some into savings for college. So far the car that was supposed to be a 'gift' has cost me almost $1000.00! I just noticed the change oil stick is expired so I guess I'll have to do that too! These things should have been taken care of BEFORE he gave her the car in my opinion!!! My daughter's Father obviously thinks he's done his part, he's a real pig as far as I'm concerned! I only wish now that I had a court order and things would not be this way in my daughter's Senior year. I can only imagine how hard it is going to be for us to make it through her college years! I feel like he has totally screwed me and NOT in a good way!
Still struggling but I will NEVER give up!